Season 44 Featured Game No. 3...Milwaukee at Philadelphia...plus bonus

Philadelphia 72, Milwaukee 64
UNDEFEATED PHOBIA OUTLASTS PESKY GREYHOUNDS
PHILADELPHIA -- After blowing away Milwaukee by 28 on the road, the 3-0 Phobia had to work hard to earn an 8-point victory at home, one that was not totally secure until the final 9 time units.

In retrospect, a slow first quarter doomed Milwaukee in this one, as the defending champions from Philly got off to a 15-8 lead. But from then on things were pretty even, with the visitors getting within four points with 21 time units remaining in the game. A fast-break miss by Milwaukee's Con Gusto that would have brought them within 2 was quickly turned into a 6-point advantage with eight ticks left after Colquitt Croix found Carga Larga open for a short jumper.

Milwaukee is now 1-2 on the season, but they are done with Philadelphia for the season after having acquitted themselves well in the second meeting.

PLAYER OF GAME
Philadelphia's splendid point guard COLQUITT CROIX came into this game averaging 24 points per game, and that's exactly how many he scored against Milwaukee's fine rookie guard Fatty McButterpants. Croix's 24 was high in the game as were his 5 assists. He also tied for most steals in the game with 2 and pulled down 3 rebounds. The 6-2, fifth-year star was 9 for 16 from the floor, potting 4 of 9 3-pointers and going 2 for 2 from the foul stripe. Entering the final quarter, Croix had 4 fouls but managed to stay in the contest.

Other 20-plus GVP performances
-- Philadelphia's power forward Sloppy Dollop dominated the much larger Ape Con Myth, getting 16 points, leading his team in rebounds with 6 and dishing out 2 assists.

-- Milwaukee's rookie point guard Fatty McButterpants led his team in scoring with 17 and in assists with 3, grabbing 2 rebounds as well.

-- The Greyhound veteran Ugatta Noluvfer Spikie totally outplayed his opposite, Carga Larga. The 7-1 Spikie, now in his 8th year, had 10 points while registering game-highs in both rebounds (7) and blocked shots (4), adding 1 assist.

-- Milwaukee's small forward Faku Sosume reversed the dominance he felt at the hands of Wawa Wewa in their last meeting, when Wewa was Player of the Game. This time, Sosume was in command, scoring 16 points, grabbing 5 boards, tying for game-high with 2 steals and passing out 2 assists.

NEXT UP: We close out bracket No. 3 with a cross-over meeting -- Seattle (1-1) at the surprising Charleston Mountaineers (2-0).



A first look at All Star Game competition
Getting that All Star Game red star on your card in a consistent manner can go a long way toward achieving Hall of Fame status. It is the easiest of the 10 honors to get, but depending on the competition at your position, even the best of the best have been shut out from time to time.
Here is a list of who is up this season at every position
Based on the criteria of previous play, potential and current season performance, I have bold faced all the candidates at each position.
There appears to be healthy competition at every position in both conferences, but the toughest place to make the All Star Game this season seems to be at forward in the East Division where eight solid candidates are vying for 3 or 4 spots. And that does not even include Al E. Orden of Dallas, who is right on the brink of being a serious contender.

Any thoughts?

West

Guards (3 or 4 spots)
Bob Kittle, Seattle
Theon Greyjoy, Seattle
YourMajesty Lumpkins, San Jose
Dayshotta Leo, San Jose
Cremofsum Yunguy, Oklahoma City
Brownie McShytles, Oklahoma City
Great Gruncle Terry, Sacramento (rookie)
Potus Obama, Sacramento
Dr. Marcus Brody, Los Angeles
Norman Conquest, Los Angeles or Steve Carter, Los Angeles

Forwards (3 or 4 spots)
Bougainvillea Hedge, Seattle
Stu Gatz, Seattle
Cam Caldwell, San Jose (rookie)
Egg Yolk Carpaccio, San Jose
Goodbar "Muddy" Masterson, Oklahoma City
Peter Pizza, Oklahoma City
Doo-rag Dripp, Sacramento
Pap Smearz, Sacramento
Baba Brinkman, Los Angeles
Anurag Dickshit, Los Angeles

Centers (2 or 3 spots)
Seven Castanza, Seatttle (rookie)
Hunk R. Down, San Jose
Willie Carry McCoffee, Oklahoma City
Tree Fiddy, Sacramento
Chutcher Mouthchair, Los Angeles


East

Guards (3 or 4 spots)
Lapiz Lapiz Boligrafo, Chicago
Lannigan Lord Hobo, Chicago (rookie)
Cat Timol, Charleston
Red Reparee, Charleston
Bingo Bango, Dallas
Louie Subgum, Dallas
Baskets Weaver or Con Gusto, Milwaukee
Fatty McButterpants, Milwaukee (rookie)
Colquitt Croix, Philadelphia
Akbar Zagobia, Philadelphia

Forwards (3 or 4 spots)
Bang-Bang Reiner, Chicago
Pietro Destroyer, Chicago
Frog Morton, Charleston (rookie)
Flip Testerton, Charleston
Al E. Orden, Dallas
Chip Battoe, Dallas
Faku Sosume, Milwaukee
Ape Con Myth, Milwaukee
Sloppy Dollop, Philadelphia
Wawa Wewa, Philadelphia

Centers (2 or 3 spots)
Yo Noid, Chicago
J.J. Gargantuan, Charleston
Gotoo Grot, Dallas
Ugatta Noluvfer Spikie, Milwaukee
Carga Larga, Philadelphia


Tyler picks
West

Guards (3 or 4 spots)
Bob Kittle, Seattle
YourMajesty Lumpkins, San Jose
Dayshotta Leo, San Jose


Forwards (3 or 4 spots)
Bougainvillea Hedge, Seattle
Doo-rag Dripp, Sacramento
Pap Smearz, Sacramento
Baba Brinkman, Los Angeles


Centers (2 or 3 spots)
Hunk R. Down, San Jose
Chutcher Mouthchair, Los Angeles


East

Guards (3 or 4 spots)
Bingo Bango, Dallas
Fatty McButterpants, Milwaukee (rookie)
Colquitt Croix, Philadelphia

Forwards (3 or 4 spots)
Pietro Destroyer, Chicago
Flip Testerton, Charleston
Chip Battoe, Dallas
Sloppy Dollop, Philadelphia

Centers (2 or 3 spots)
Yo Noid, Chicago
J.J. Gargantuan, Charleston


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Featured Game No. 2 Season 44...Philadelphia at Milwaukee

PHILADELPHIA 97, MILWAUKEE 69
PHOBIA FLEXES ITS MUSCLES IN MILWAUKEE BEAT-DOWN
MILWAUKEE--The defending champion Philadelphia Phobia shot 75.5 percent and tallied 36 points in the third quarter on the way to a 97-69 thrashing of the Milwaukee Greyhounds.

Philly is now 2-0, while Milwaukee drops to 1-1.

This is the first time in MBA history Milwaukee has fallen behind Philadelphia in head-to-head wins. The Phobia now leads the all-time series 53-52.
The visiting team is now 7-0 this season in the MBA.

Philadelphia's 22 team assists were just 2 away from the MBA record held by three different teams.


POINTS PREVENTED BY QUARTER
Philadelphia 4 - 0 - 4 - 5 Total=13
Milwaukee....0 - 0 - 0 - 2 Total=2

TOP INDIVIDUAL IN POINTS PREVENTED
1. Akbar Zagobia, Philadelphia 5
5 others tied with 2



PLAYER OF GAME
Newly obtained Philadelphia forward WAWA WEWA stepped out of his usual unselfish mode to light up Milwaukee for 23 points, dominating Faku Sosume in the process. Wewa, the first forward to capture part of an assist title, didn't skip on the helpers either, tying for game-high with 6. He also tied for team-high in rebounds with 4, while adding 1 steal. For the game, Wewa was 11 of 12 from the floor, including 1 slam dunk and 1 for 2 from the foul line.

Other 20-plus GVP performers
-- Philadelphia's marvelous point guard Colquitt Croix followed his 23-point opening-game POG performance with a game-high 25 points in a captivating head-to-head tussle with Rookie of the Year candidate Fatty McButterpants of Milwaukee. Croix dropped in 5 treys, grabbed 2 boards and dished 5 assists in the big victory.

-- Philly power forward Sloppy Dollop put together a fine game with 14 points, 4 rebounds and 2 assists.

-- Going head-to-head with one of the MBA's top guards proved to be no problem for 6-7 rookie point guard Fatty McButterpants of Milwaukee. McButterpants led his team in scoring with 19 points, in assists with 4 and in rebounds with 5. His rebound total was the game's highest. After two games, McButterpants is averaging 20 points per contest.

NEXT UP: Charleston (1-0) at Chicago (0-1)

Featured Game No. 1, Season 44...Charleston at Sacramento

CHARLESTON 77, SACRAMENTO 69
NEW-LOOK MOUTAINEERS STUN SACRAMENTO
SACRAMENTO--Completing an all-visitors sweep of the first bracket, the Charleston Mountaineers, with just one returning starter from last season's squad, bested a favored Sacramento team in a highly charged cross-over contest, 77-69.

And if the loss was not stunning enough for the luck-less River Dogs, they also lost the services of center Tree Fiddy, who went down to injury with 34 time units remaining in the final quarter (team trailed 63-60 at the time) and will also miss the next important game against Los Angeles.

PLAYERS OF THE GAME
After spending one season in the cut pile, fourth-season guard CAT TIMOL demonstrated his improved capabilities with a flourish, tying for team-high in scoring with 18 points and also tying for team-high in rebounds with 6. The 5-10 Timol also tied for game-high in blocked shots with 3. The little guy totally outplayed Potus Obama of Sacramento, going 7 for 12 from the floor and 4 for 4 from the foul stripe in his debut as a starter.

Before going down with the fourth injury of his career, Sacramento center TREE FIDDY was keeping his team in the game, registering game-high numbers in both points (20) and rebounds (7). Despite going up against brilliant defender J.J. Gargantuan, Fiddy managed a 9 for 14 day with a slam dunk and 2 for 2 from the foul stripe. He will return after missing the next game.

Other 20-plus GVP Performers
-- The man Charleston acquired to run its offense, Red Reparee, did just that with a game-high 7 assists and 13 points. The fifth-year veteran took it to the highly-rated rookie Gruncle Terry, shutting him out and dominating the newcomer in his first game. Welcome to the MBA.

-- Although his counterpart was POG, Charleston's longtime center J.J. Gargantuan nearly matched Tree Fiddy statistically, getting 12 points, tying for team rebounding honors with 6, tying for most blocked shots with 3, dishing 3 assists and getting 1 steal.

-- Charleston's new small forward Flip Testerton was a high-flying circus act in his initial outing as a Mountaineer, tying for team-high in points with 18 and in rebounds with 6. The 6-5 pogo stick slammed home 7 dunks in his 9 field goals and played superb defense.

-- The River Dogs were anxiously awaiting the return of 8-year veteran Pap Smearz after missing him most of last season due to injury. Smearz did not disappoint in his first game back, playing his usual steady game. The 6-8 forward had 15 points and 5 rebounds.

STANDINGS
East Division
1st -- Milwaukee 1-0 (points differential tie-breaker)
2nd -- Philadelphia 1-0 (division wins tie-breaker)
3rd -- Charleston 1-0
4th -- Dallas 0-1 (points differential tie-breaker)
Last-- Chicago 0-1

West Division
1st -- Los Angeles 1-0 (points differential tie-breaker)
2nd -- San Jose 1-0
3rd -- Sacramento 0-1 (points differential tie-breaker)
4th -- Oklahoma City 0-1 (points differential tie-breaker)
Last --Seattle 0-1

Next bracket (no. 2)
--Dallas at San Jose in a cross-over, with the Demons facing an early 0-2 mark
--FEATURED GAME: Philadelphia at Milwaukee, as the powerhouse champs look to see what this new rookie Fatty McButterpants is all about.
--Charleston, following a strong win, looks to bury the Gale in Chicago.
--Los Angeles at Sacramento, as The Big One catches a big break, playing their main playoff contenders, the R-Dogs without their injured starting center.
--Oklahoma City at Seattle in a game that will give one of these weak sisters a .500 record and early hope,

EARLY SEASON POWER RANKINGS
1. Philadelphia Phobia
2. San Jose Fighting Amigos
3. Los Angeles Big One
4. Dallas Demons
5. Charleston Mountaineers
6. Chicago Gale
7. Sacramento River Dogs
8. Milwaukee Greyhounds
9. Oklahoma City Lariats
10. Seattle Stampede

Awards Predictions for Season 44

ALL-MBA TEAM
Dave
G- Dr. Marcus Brody, Los Angeles
G- Colquitt Croix, Philadelphia
C- Hunk R. Down, San Jose
F- Chip Battoe, Dallas
F- Bang-Bang Reiner, Chicago

Tyler
G- Colquitt Croix, Philadelphia
G- Dayshotta Leo, San Jose
C- Hunk R. Down, San Jose
F- Chip Battoe, Dallas
f- Pietro Destroyer, Chicago


ALL ROOKIE TEAM
Tyler
G- Fatty McButterpants, Milwaukee
G- Lannigan Lord Hobo, Chicago
C- Seven Castanza, Seattle
F- Frog Morton, Charleston
F- Cam Caldwell, San Jose

Dave
G- "Great" Gruncle Terry, Sacramento
G- Lannigan Lord Hobo, Chicago
C- Seven Castanza, Seattle
F- Frog Morton, Charleston
F- Cam Caldwell, San Jose

REGULAR SEASON MVP
Chip "the Crip" Battoe (unanimous)

ROOKIE OF THE YEAR
Dave- "Great" Gruncle Terry, Sacramento
Tyler- Lannigan Lord Hobo, Chicago

NOTE: Seven of the 16 rookies are starters this season.

Top Awards Players, Oldest Players entering Season 44

MOST AWARDS (all technically in reach of the Hall of Fame this season
9- J.J. Gargantuan, center, Charleston

8- Pippi Pippistrelli, center, San Jose
8- Colquitt Croix, guard, Philadelphia

6- Bang-Bang Reiner, forward, Chicago
6- Baba Brinkman, forward Los Angeles

5- Bill Cull, forward, Chicago
5- Pietro Destroyer, forward, Chicago
5- Pap Smearz, forward, Sacramento
5- Steve Carter, guard, Los Angeles
5- Sloppy Dollop, forward, Philadelphia


OLDEST ACTIVE MBA PLAYERS
16- Steve Carter, back-up guard, Los Angeles

14- Wayan Garuda, back-up center, Los Angeles

12- Shits McGriddle, back-up center, Sacramento
12- Giacomo Ferrari, back-up guard, Oklahoma City

11- Buzz Kill, cut pile guard

10- Jesus Moron Joseph, back-up guard, San Jose

A Look at Season 44 Rosters

A Look at Season 44 Rosters

ROSTERS, YOUNGEST TO OLDEST (players up for retirement)
1. Charleston … 3.3 seasons per player (1 up for retirement)
2. Philadelphia…3.9 (1)
3. Milwaukee…41 (3)
4. Seattle … 43 (2)
5. Dallas…4.7 (4)
6. Chicago…4.9 (5)
7. Sacramento… 5.0 (4)
8. San Jose…5.3 (5)
9. Oklahoma City …5.6 (5)
10.Los Angeles…6.2 (4)


STARTING LINEUPS, YOUNGEST TO OLDEST (starters up for retirement)
1 Los Angeles…3.8 seasons per starter (1 up for retirement)
2. Dallas…4.2 (1)
3. Charleston …4.4 (1)
4. Sacramento … 4.4 (2)
5. Philadelphia… 4.6 (0)
6. San Jose…4.8 (2)
6. Oklahoma City… 4.8 (2)
8. Milwaukee… 5.2 (3)
8. Chicago … 5.2 (3)
8. Seattle…5.2 (2)

MOST ROSTER CHANGES PER TEAM (new starters from previous year)
1. Charleston … 6 new players (4 new starters)
2. Seattle…5 new players (3 new starters)
2. Milwaukee…5 new players (3 new starters)
2. Oklahoma City … 5 new players (2 new starters)
2. Philadelphia…5 new players (2 new starters)
6. Chicago…3 new players (2 new starters)
6. Dallas …3 new players (3 new starters)
8. San Jose…2 new players (1 new starter)
9. Sacramento … 1 new players (1 new starter)
9. Los Angeles…1 new player (2 new starters)

SEASON 44 PREDICTIONS/PREVIEW

THE WEST

1.(unanimous) San Jose Fighting Amigos 8-2, First place in Season 43...lost in Finals to Philadelphia
Biggest losses: forward Blue "Rondo" Alaturk retired after missing most of previous season to injury.
Major additions: rookie forward Cam Caldwell will start at small forward
The skinny:Addressed need at starting forward and added depth with rookie guard Cha-Cha Bamba. Big three of YourMajesty Lumpkins, Dayshotta Leo and All-MBA center Hunk R. Down are back. Biggest question is whether forward Egg Yolk Carpaccio can continue his improved play from last season's playoffs. Should be able to fend off Sacramento and Los Angeles for first in the West.

2.(unanimous) Sacramento River Dogs 4-6, Fourth place in Season 43
Biggest losses:Point guard Con Gusto to free agency
Major additions: 6-5 point guard "Great" Gruncle Terry, top rookie point guard in draft; return of veteran forward Pap Smearz lost to injury last season.
The skinny:Could this finally be a playoff year for the R-Dogs? Nabbing Terry in the draft to lead the offense and the return of Smearz makes Sacramento starting lineup a solid one. Back-up guard Peeshie Pooshie, acquired in trade, should help off the bench. And if center Tree Fiddy can have his second straight injury-free year, coach Frankie Pantangeli's boys could finally be invited into the post-season after years of "waiting in the lobby." If they don't make the playoffs, it will mark a 10th straight year of futility and require a dice roll for possibly changing the franchise city.

3.(unanimous) Los Angeles Big One 4-6, Third place in Season 43
Biggest losses:None
Major additions: Guard Norman Conquest, defensive stalwart and top free-agent guard in draft.
The skinny:Conquest replaces league-leading rebounder Steve Carter in the starting lineup, just as the latter is starting to show his 16 seasons. Seven-foot forward Tomm Foolerie will replace seven-season starter Walter Sobchack at forward, which should at least add more rebounding. The Big One is a deep, deep team that has the potential to make the playoffs and even finish atop the West. There is almost no chance they will finish lower than third.

4.(unanimous) Seattle Stampede 2-8, Last place in Season 43
Biggest losses:None
Major additions:Rookie center Seven Castanza and rookie two guard Potatoes O'Gratin, both upgrades to starting lineup.
The skinny:Improved its roster somewhat since last season, replacing half the squad. Scoring will still be a problem for the Stampede, which finished last in the league with just 67.5 points per game. Also last in defense (82.1 ppg yielded), improved only slightly there.

5.(unanimous) Oklahoma City Lariats 5-5, Second place in Season 43...lost in Semi-finals to Philadelphia
Biggest losses:All-MBA forward and team MVP Bang-Bang Reiner(19.0 ppg) to free agency; league-leader in assists, guard Mel A. Noma retired.
Major additions:Back-up center, 7-foot rookie Dupa Yashu
The skinny:Another re-vamped roster with 5 new players, there will be no big surprising season like last year's for the Lariats, who will see league-best four straight playoff appearances come to an end.

THE EAST

1.(Dave-1, Tyler-2) Chicago Gale 7-3, Second place in Season 43...lost in Semi-finals to San Jose
Biggest losses:Three-year starter and defensive mainstay, guard Norman Conquest to free agency.
Major additions:All-MBA forward Bang-Bang Reiner (19.0 ppg) and excellent-looking rookie two guard, 6-6 Lannigan Lord Hobo.
The skinny:Gale has not had back-to-back playoff appearances in eight seasons, but along with Philadelphia, look like the cream of the crop in the East. Forward Bang-Bang Reiner was runner-up to league MVP Chip Battoe last season while leading surprising Lariats. He sends 19.5 points per game scorer Bill Cull to the Chicago bench, losing no scoring punch and adding defense. Rookie two guard Hobo is a big, strong rebounder and point guard Lapiz Lapiz Boligrafo has added accuracy to his already-potent 3-point shot of last season. Chicago surprised everyone by jumping into the playoffs last season, but this year they are aiming for the whole enchilada.

1.(Tyler-1, Dave-2) Philadelphia Phobia 9-1, First place in Season 43...Won it all!
Biggest losses:Longtime stalwart center Diss Reflexia (14.7 ppg), MVP of Playoffs.
Major additions:Top defender and league-leading assist man (tied) forward Wawa Wewa in trade with Charleston. Rookie forward Cheetah Vajajay further adds to depth.
The skinny:They return all but center Diss Reflexia, but added strong team player Wawa Wewa to a team that lost just two games all season and won the 16th championship for this proud franchise. 6-11 center Carga Larga is a more-than-capable replacement in the middle, and the team defense, a league-best 67.0 per game yield, should be just as good. With the retirement of Naf Naf, fifth-year point guard Colquitt Croix will battle Los Angeles second-year guard Dr. Marcus Brody for the distinction of the league's top man at that position. Croix could finally win his first scoring title.

3.(Dave-3, Tyler-4) Charleston Mountaineers 5-5, Fourth place in Season 43
Biggest losses:Three starters...Hall of Fame guards Naf Naf and Beezow Bop-Bop retired, forward Wawa Wewa traded to Philadelphia.
Major additions:Four of five starters replaced...included is top-rated rookie forward, 6-9 Frog Morton.
The skinny:The league's youngest roster looks nothing like the 10-0 powerhouse of two seasons ago, but they will enter the campaign in better shape than expected after a 50 percent revamp. Center J.J. Gargantuan is one award away from being the league's only active Hall of Famer, but he did not have a good go of it last season and has regressed some more in the off season. Almost no prayer of out-distancing Philly and Chicago for a playoff spot, but could be interesting team.

3.(Tyler-3, Dave-4) Dallas Demons 6-4, Third place in Season 43
Biggest losses:11-season veteran forward, "Mr. Dallas," Matthew Vanden Boogart (16.2 ppg) to retirement.
Major additions:rebounding behemoth and league's biggest player, 7-2 GoToo Grot, acquired in trade with Sacramento, will replace General Horseplay at center.
The skinny:Just missed playoffs last season with fine 6-4 record. Had a piss-poor draft and failed to fill in forward hole left by Boogart. But they still have sensational league MVP forward Chip "the Crip" Battoe, who will move from big to small forward this season. Could surprise, but doubtful.

5.(unanimous) Milwaukee Greyhounds 0-10, Last place in Season 43
Biggest losses:forward Flip Testerton, team's top rebounder, to free agency.
Major additions:6-7 rookie point guard Fatty McButterpants who will immediately become focus of team's rebuild; free agent point guard Con Gusto from Sacramento who adds depth.
The skinny:Revamped 0-10 roster of a season ago by 50 percent. Should win a game or two, but getting out of the cellar will be a chore.