Season 51 predictions...lists and schedule

 Last season Dave got 3 of 5 finishes correct in the West...1 of 5 correct in the East, including Philly in first...40 percent overall. Only got 2 of 4 playoff teams correct.

Last season Tyler got 1 of 5 right in the West and 2 of 5 correct in the East...30 percent overall. Got all 4 playoff teams correct.

The West

1. LOS ANGELES BIG ONE (First place, 9-1 last season, 5-0 in playoffs). The defending champs enter the season on a 13-game winning streak, just three short of tying the record set by Dallas in Seasons 46-47. The top scoring team in the MBA last season (82.1 ppg), The Big One has everyone back except for power forward Turk Attaturk, who will be replaced by veteran Christ Almighty. Unbelievably, the most pure point guard in MBA history, Great Gruncle Terry, got even better. 

2. SAN JOSE FIGHTING AMIGOS (Second place, 8-2 last season, 1-2 in playoffs). Same lineup to start the season as they had last campaign. Lone roster change is rebound madman K-Ream Skyhook coming off bench at center, replacing retired Wayland T. Pillsbury. Jesse Shershot going for fifth All-MBA season in a row and fourth straight scoring title. Cremeofsum Yunguy's return at the point after testing free agency was a big "whew" moment for Amigos fans.

3. GILLETTE HUMPS (Fourth place, 2-8 last season). Tiger Masterson takes over as head coach, replacing Flip Testerton, who lasted one and a half seasons. Masterson, the only new head coach in the league, will take over one of the two youngest rosters in the league, Humps are one of two teams on the bubble for possible franchise move (again). They added top rookie guard Lefty Scavenger to go with team's top scorer Freddy Gooch. They benefit from a weak-ass division, but its not a stretch for them to finish last.

4. SEATTLE STAMPEDE (Last place, 1-9 last season). League's youngest roster getting slightly better talent-wise with addition of the diminutive sharpshooting rookie Fuck Mountain at guard. 

5. SACRAMENTO RIVER DOGS (Third place, 4-6 last season). Oldest team in MBA will be hard-pressed to finish ahead of youngsters from Gillette and Seattle. Yet, if San Jose falters, R-Dogs could surprise with playoff run.

The East

1. PHILADELPHIA PHOBIA (First place, 7-3 last season, 2-4 in playoffs). Loaded with talent, the Phobia added 6-8 guard Vinny Zazeech to its starting lineup, moving second-year star Ehhy Table to the point and benching fan favorite Little Dickie Papers. In a division that has no weak sisters, the Phobia stands out enough to have backers salivating for the franchise's 17th championship. After consecutive 7-3 campaigns, Philly is ready to break through.

2. OKLAHOMA CITY LARIATS (Fourth place, 5-5 last season). Lariats nailed their one pick in the draft, getting rookie forward Buba Lipa to shore up biggest weakness at the small spot. Lipa should also help team improve defensively. The team led the East in scoring behind guards Handsy Joe Potatoe and King Czardines, who return as better passers.

3. CHARLESTON MOUNTAINEERS (Third place, 5-5 last season). Same starting lineup for MBA's top defensive team, but with better passing from both guards. Deeper bench with addition of Turk Attaturk, but it's going to be a chore to grab second playoff spot in East.

4. DALLAS DEMONS (Last place, 4-6 last season). In jeapordy for dice roll to change cities, but the addition of star rookie forward Satan Israel to go with Juzan Djinn and Chochky Galumpkus make them serious playoff contender.

5.MILWAUKEE GREYHOUNDS (Second place, 5-5 last season, 0-2 in playoffs). Added nothing of value. Fielding same lineup will make it tough to return to post-season. Could be best last-place team since Chicago was drummed out of the league.

ALL MBA PREDICTIONS

Guard--Jesse Shershot, San Jose

Guard--Ehhy Table, Philadelphia

Center--Chochky Galumpkus, Dallas

Forward--Crentis Dentist, Los Angeles

Forward--Satan Israel, Dallas

(Tyler had two correct predictions last season with Shershot and Dentist...Dave had one with Shershot)

League MVP

Ehhy Table, Philadelphia

(Neither Dave nor Tyler picked the MVP last season)

Rookie of the Year

Satan Israel, Dallas

(Neither Dave nor Tyler picked the MVP last season)

Tyler's predictions...entered after Game 2 (Fenestration was MVP that game)

Predictions

1. Philly

2. Dallas

3. Okc

4. Milwaukee

5. Charleston

1. LA

2. San Jose

3. Sacramento

4. Gillette 

5. Seattle

MVP

Shershot

All MBA

Shershot

Gooch

Galumpkus

Fenestration

Israel

10-PLUS SEASONS IN THE MBA          

18 seasons…Buzz Kill, cut pile

15 seasons…Cremeofsum Yunguy, San Jose

14 seasons…J.J. Gargantuan, Dallas (Hall of Fame)

14 seasons…Peter Pizza, cut pile

13 seasons…Tree Fiddy, Sacramento (Hall of Fame)

13 seasons…Ape Con Myth, Milwaukee

11 seasons…Carga Larga, Oklahoma City

11 seasons…Bouganvillea Hedge, Sacramento

11 seasons…Al A. Orden, Dallas

11 seasons…Cat Timol, Los Angeles

10 seasons…Spicy Chicken Choop-Choop, cut pile

10 seasons…Sheik Yerbouti, Philadelphia

10 seasons…Anurag Dickshit, Sacramento

 

TEAMS IN JEOPARDY OF LEAVING CURRENT CITY

Gillette, again

Dallas, last in two of the most recent three seasons.

 

HALL OF FAME WATCH

12 awards…J.J. Gargantuan, Dallas (already in Hall)

12 awards…Tree Fiddy, Sacramento (already in Hall)

11 awards…Jesse Shershot, San Jose (already in Hall)

8 awards…Great Gruncle Terry, Los Angeles

6 awards…Chochky Galumpkus, Dallas

5 awards…Wawa Wewa, Los Angeles

5 awards…Fatty McButterpants, Milwaukee

5 awards…Frog Morton, Charleston

 

CONSECUTIVE GAMES

100 straight and counting…Wawa Wewa, Los Angeles…just 6^th player to hit 100 straight

70 straight and counting…Ape Con Myth, Milwaukee

All-time leader is Raisin Sport…120 straight games

2^nd…J.J. Gargantuan…114 straight

3^rd…Doug Fresh…110 straight

3^rd…Yards Brighty…110 straight

5^th…Lemon Jell-o…100 straight

 

New Head Coaches

Tiger Masterson hired by Gillette to replace Flip Testerton

 

SEASON 51 SCHEDULE

Season 51 gets underway with first game of the campaign as the Featured Game...playoff contenders Oklahoma City at Charleston.