Sunday, February 25, 2024

Season 54 Draft...aka...The Rich Get Richer

 Almost unbelievably, the rich got richer in the Season 54 draft, as the two-time defending champion Dallas Demons snagged the prize of the draft, rookie guard Vicious Hicks.

Hicks was plucked by Dallas with the 23rd pick, a prime pick, which they slyly acquired from Charleston the previous season in a trade for center Johnny Bananas. Still, for the future superstar to last as long as he did in the draft and for the Demons to get him on their first prime pick roll is some pretty amazing shit.

The other amazing occurence was the 29 rolls it took for Philadelphia to gain its eventual prime pick, rookie forward Leonard Pinth Garnel, the player they origiinally wanted to get with their first roll. It took the Phobia two complete trips through the available players to land Garnel as the 26th pick. He was the one they wanted in the first place.

According to the rankings given by Dave to each player prior to the draft (39 points for the best player, 1 point for the worst) and where they eventually ended up, the sheer talent influx per team would be thus:

1. Dallas Demons...108 points

2. Seattle Stampede...106 points

3. Los Angeles Big One...102 points

4. Philadelphia Phobia...89 points

5. Gillette Humps...80 points

6. San Jose Fighting Amigos...75 points

7. Sacramento River Dogs...74 points

8. Milwaukee Greyhounds...58 points

9. Charleston Mountaineers...48 points

10. Oklahoma City Lariats...40 points


FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER...BOB KOSTAS REVIEWS THE MBA DRAFT (per Tyler and the link)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Os-hwFjlck8




QUICK ANALYSIS BY TEAM

DALLAS DEMONS
Got the best player in the draft. How good? Good enough that the league's leading scorer from last season and one of two All-MBA guards, Kopi Luwak, will be replaced by him...him being guard Vicious Hick. They also added a fine backup center in second-year man China P and very promising rookie forward Venial Sinn to one of the finest rosters ever seen in the MBA. They actually got better.

SEATTLE STAMPEDE
They seem poised to repeat as a playoff team, having picked up the best rookie forward in the draft in Erik A. Crocidale and maybe the best defensive guard in the league in shut-down rookie Hilbee "the Skinny German" Juggleboy. The other rookie they picked up, Harry "Big Stink" Merdaio, will challenge for the starting center spot to replace longtime stalwart Sky Masterson. They got better too.

LOS ANGELES BIG ONE
It wouldn't take much for them to get better than consecutive last-place finishes, but L.A. took a big leap by getting the second best guard in the draft, rookie Pinky Toe and veteran star forward D. Fenestration.

PHILADELPHIA PHOBIA
The Phobia used all four of its picks on forwards, the best of which is 6-10 rookie defensive specialist Leonard Pinth Garnel, who will replace longtime forward favorite D. Fenestration. Right now, however, they are worse off at center and guard then they were last season, which will make it tough to compete for a playoff spot.

GILLETTE HUMPS
The Humps have an excellent chance of defending their West Division crown, nabbing two forwards in the draft who are both better than last year's starter, LaJon Brames. All-MBA power forward Sheetrock Hudson, the league rebounding leader, was procured with the next-to-last pick in the draft. And Jimmy Potsandpans was also added as a capable back-up. The other four starters return.

SAN JOSE FIGHTING AMIGOS
The Amigos lost superstar Jesse Shershot to retirement, but finally shored up their center position by getting the best pivot in the draft, veteran Sky Masterson. Rookie forward Scobee adds much-needed youth to an old roster and could actually beat out longtimer Eddie "the Milkman" Creamer for a starting job. These additions might be enough to contend for the playoffs.

SACRAMENTO RIVER DOGS
The R-Dogs started the draft with just four players on their roster, but added three veterans to make them at least respectable. Getting forward Kevin Duran-Duran to return to the team on the 35th pick was a huge difference-maker. Freddy Gooch can defend at the guard position and Thomas Thomas Thomas is a proven shot-maker. They still have zero centers, however.

MILWAUKEE GREYHOUNDS
Started the draft with a fine first pick in guard Ehhy Table, but petered out thereafter. If Table, heading into his fifth season, can fulfill his long-noted talent, and old-timers J.J. Gargantuan and Ape Con Myth don't fall too far off their game, Milwaukee could get as high as third in the East.

CHARLESTON MOUNTAINEERS
Horrendous draft netted them no starting help. Got a good backup center in rookie jumping jack Brother Jasper but are currently without a MBA-quality starters at guard and forward having lost starters Freddy Gooch and All-MBA forward Sheetrock Hudson. Looks bleak.

OKLAHOMA CITY LARIATS
Overall influx of talent was putrid due to three horrendous picks. But the 29th pick was Hall of Fame forward Crentis Dentist, who plugs a hole in the starting lineup in a big way. Tyler believes the Dentist addition improves the Lariats more than Hicks does for the Demons. That sounds unlikely on the surface, but may prove to be correct in the long haul. The Lariats seem like the second best team again.

NEXT UP: Player improvements and regressions, followed by the cut draft.




 


 

No comments: