SEASON 43 ROOKIES

The MBA lost about eight excellent players to retirement following Season 42, and although the incoming class of Season 43 rookies will not immediately replace the talent vacuum, there are eight to nine players ranging from Hall of Fame worthy to solid.

Here's the ranking of the new rookies, who can be divided into six categories.

BY FAR THE BEST NEWCOMER
1. Chip "the Crip" Battoe, 6-8 forward....Will be an immediate star. The prize of the class is a shot-blocking maniac, an excellent rebounder and an immediate starter on whatever team gets him. Should score at least 15 points per game. Tyler ranks him 1st, Dave ranks him 1st.


ANY TEAM WOULD WELCOME THESE TWO
2. Willie Carry McCoffee, 7-0 center....Plays above average defense and is a top-flight rebounder. Can score from three different zones, although he is unselfish to a fault as far as taking the shot is concerned. One of three excellent young pivots in the draft. Tyler ranks him 2nd, Dave ranks him 2nd.

3. Dr. Marcus Brody, 6-1 guard....Best guard in the draft, hands down. Above average 3-point shooter who can get off his shot from downtown. Also plays great defense, hits the boards and handles the ball well enough to play either guard position. Future is bright. Tyler ranks him 3rd, Dave ranks him 3rd.


THEIR STRENGTHS ARE ALLURING
4. Tomm Foolerie, 7-0 forward....First 7-foot forward in the league since Baba Ghanouj. Not a great rebounder for his size, but plays really good defense. Not super aggressive offensively and kind of weak near the basket. But he'll make a team and contribute right away. Tyler ranks him 4th, Dave ranks him 5th.

5. GoToo Grot, 7-2 center....Biggest man to enter the league in some time is a monster on the boards and the best rebounder in the rookie class. He will score a lot, especially on put-backs. Is fast, passes very well, but plays little defense against the shot. Tyler ranks him 5th, Dave ranks him 6th.

6. General Horseplay, 6-8 center...Third rookie center in the top six newcomers. The most offensive-minded of the trio who has great moves and should score a bundle down low. A superb passer. Not a great rebounder and just a perfunctory defender. Tyler ranks him 8th, Dave ranks him 4th.


SOMEWHAT INTRIGUING, SHOULD MAKE A TEAM
7. James "Cherry Challenge" Payne, 6-7 forward...Distant relative of just-retired Hall of Fame star Max Payne. Probably the best ball hawk among rookies and above-average defender against the shot. A weak rebounder who can shoot but is a reluctant scorer. Tyler ranks him 6th, Dave ranks him 7th.

8. Hurricane Furrwizard, 5-11 guard...Undersized guard is second-best at his position in a bad year for that spot. Can score but has only a nodding acquaintance with defense and almost no rebounding ability. Tyler ranks him 7th, Dave ranks him 8th.

9. Mortimer Masterson, 6-6 forward....Token Masterson is really good defender who can pass the ball with the best of them. Rebounding is so-so and his shooting leaves much to be desired. Tyler ranks him 9th, Dave ranks him 9th.


LIMITED ABILITY, BORDERLINE HANGERS-ON
10. Tweedle D. Dee, 6-1 guard....Average shot, good ball handler. If he does anything defensively against the shot its only to foul. Tyler ranks him 11th, Dave ranks him 10th.

11. Junior Dabas, 5-10 guard....Another undersized guard who can shoot a little but has defensive skills that are well hidden against the shot. Quick and will steal the ball. Tyler ranks him 10th, Dave ranks him 12th.

12. Hassan Fourstar, 6-8 forward....The best ball handler in the draft, including guards. Decent rebounder but will struggle to score. Is a terrible Lyft driver in his spare time. Tyler ranks him 13th, Dave ranks him 11th.

13. Anass Rammer, 5-11 guard....Impressed some scouts early on, but upon closer inspection, general consensus is that he will be a buster. Yet another small guard. Can pass well but can score consistently only in the short zone. Yet, he takes a lot of shots. Tyler ranks him 12th, Dave ranks him 13th.


MADE TO BE CUT
14. Pombazo, 6-5 forward....Smallest forward and easily the worst of the lot. To say he is a reluctant rebounder is an understatement. He sucks at it. Only redeeming attribute is a really nice short jump shot. But he loves to launch 3-pointers and has the worst possible chance at making them. Pitiful. Tyler ranks him 16th, Dave ranks him 14th.

15. Broccli Boy, 6-2 guard....So bad even his name is spelled wrong. He has the distinction of being the tallest of this season's crop of small rookie guards. Not much else is on his side. Tyler ranks him 15th, Dave ranks him 15th.

16. Jolly Mon Singh, 5-9 guard....The most diminutive player in the draft and the smallest of a set of small guards. Plays some defense, is fast and can shoot the medium shot okay. Ball handles pretty well. A weak shot in three of the four zones. Sunny disposition. He'll need it in the cut pile. Tyler ranks him 14th, Dave ranks him 16th.

NEW UNIFORMS
Check out the new computerized digital uniforms introduced by the MBA's rookies this season. We selected the top three rookies to model them. They are clean, sleek and spittle-proof.



THIS WILL BE THE SEASON 43 DRAFT ORDER
1. Los Angeles Big One
2. Chicago Gale
3. Milwaukee Greyhounds
4. Sacramento River Dogs
5. Philadelphia Phobia
6. San Jose Fighting Amigos
7. Seattle Stampede
8. Oklahoma City Lariats
9. Dallas Demons
10.Charleston Mountaineers

TWO NEW COACHES
-- Los Angeles hired Hall of Famer Hrundi V. Bakshi to replace Jinx Bluzemen, who lasted three seasons. Bluzemen was hired when Houston moved its franchise to the West Coast. He finished fourth his first year, then last his next two. Overall record was 9-21. This will be the first head coach job for Bakshi. His goal is to avoid a third consecutive last-place finish and another roll at changing the team's location.

-- Chicago turned to Vic Hitler to replace Mamadou Zongo, who lasted just one season with the Gale. Hitler has shown some good leadership qualities in his playing career, but insiders say he may have a dictatorial streak. But maybe that is what Chicago needs to keep them out of last place for the fourth consecutive season. It won't be easy, since they will be without two draft picks, traded away last season. Zongo finished 2-8 as a Gale coach. The franchise is teetering on leaving the city, which they almost did after last season. Heil Victor!

COMING SOON: Announcement of each team's free agents who will join the rookies in the draft.

HALL OF FAME RANKINGS UPDATED AFTER SEASON 42

-- Just retired Max Payne settles into second place in his Hall of Fame ranking.
-- Naf Naf moves up the list following his 6th season from 9th to 3rd place, tying the great Uncle Bob Masterson.
-- Beezow Bop-Bop is the newest member of the Hall, joining teammate Naf Naf as one of two members still active in the league.
-- There are now 46 members of the MBA Hall of Fame, representing 6.6 percent of the 696 players created thus far.


Hall of Fame Rankings
25 Awards
1. Curly Hogbottom 6-10 Forward Seasons 16-24 (9)

22 Awards
2. Max Payne 7-0 Center Seasons 26-42 (17) just retired (up from 3rd)

21 Awards
3. Uncle Bob Masterson 6-2 Guard Seasons 4-13 (10)
3. Naf Naf 6-0 Guard Seasons 37-? (6+) 21 awards STILL ACTIVE (up from 9th)

19 Awards
5. Cappy Gambol 6-6 Guard Seasons 1-7 (7)
5. Sagittal Occlusal 6-8 Forward Seasons 25-32 (8)
5. Hrundi V. Bakshi 6-7 Guard Seasons 29-41 (13)

18 Awards
8. Boone Doggle 6-10 Forward Seasons 23-31 (9)
8. Mamadou Zongo 6-4 Guard Seasons 15-31 (17)

17 Awards
10. Link Lennex 6-7 Forward Seasons 7-12 (6)
10. Stu Nod 6-3 Guard Seasons 6-17 (12)

16 Awards
12. Diamond Dallas Paige 6-11 Center Seasons 12-18 (7)
12. Jonny Cockaroo 6-9 Center Seasons 18-29 (12)

15 Awards
14. Doc Watson 6-2 Guard Seasons 9-17 (9)
14. Cam Bodia 6-6 Forward Seasons 15-25 (11)

14 Awards
16. Cheetos Jones 5-11 Guard Seasons 28-34 (7)
16. Dan Mann 6-1 Guard Seasons 5-13 (9)

13 Awards
18. Tommy Zoop 6-6 Guard Seasons 18-24 (7)
18. Guru Gannon 6-7 Forward Seasons 11-17 (7)
18. Raisin Sport 6-9 Forward Seasons 1-13 (13)

12 Awards
21. Bill Rustler 6-9 Center Seasons 1-10 (10)
21. Rip Slamjam 6-11 Center Seasons 5-19 (15)

11 Awards
23. Ching-Chong Chung 5-10 Guard Seasons 26-37 (11)
23. Tom Kondla 6-8 Center Seasons 28-33 (6)
23. Shucks Oyster 6-4 Guard Seasons 17-22 (6)
23. Gato Do Mato 6-11 Forward Seasons 30-36 (7)

10 Awards
27. Joey Two-Tones 6-3 Guard Seasons 18-23 (6)
27. Soul Duran 6-3 Guard Seasons 3-8 (6)
27. Bart Pitbull 7-2 Center Seasons 17-23 (7)
27. Shooter Flatch 6-7 Forward Seasons 19-25 (7)
27. Alex Pal 6-11 Center Seasons 5-10 (6)
27. Doug Fresh 5-11 Guard Seasons 1-15 (15)
27. Art Vandelay 6-7 Forward Seasons 34-39 (3)
27. Yipeekayee Masterfalcon 6-4 Guard Seasons 35-41 (7)
27. Beezow Bop-Bop 6-1 Guard Seasons 34-? (9+) (Most Recent) (Still Active)

VETERANS COMMITTEE SELECTIONS
9 Awards
36. Marshall Stax 6-7 Forward Seasons 7-13 (7)
36. Mable Reed 7-1 Center Seasons 6-16 (10)
36. Tarjetas Indice 6-7 Forward Seasons 9-17 (9)
36. Ama Spikie 6-8 Center Seasons 29-37 (9)
36. Bub Wright 6-5 Forward Seasons 1-7 (7)
36. Tug Hershorts 6-11 Forward Seasons 25-33 (9)
36. Lemon Jell-o 6-1 Guard Seasons 30-39 (10)

8 Awards
43. Silo Chamberlin 5-10 Guard Seasons 1-6 (6)
43. Benny Gumm 6-0 Guard Seasons 19-31 (13)
43. Oscar Mudcat 6-6 Guard Seasons 1-8 (8)
43. Rowdy Ron Clutch 6-7 Forward Seasons 1-9 (9)

Their place in the MBA Universe

Hall of Famer Max Payne retires as second most honored player of all time.
Five additional players earn First Tier envelope final resting place.
Drunk Uncle becomes nephew's permanent neighbor.
Two more tiers added.

MBA Season 42 Playoff Honors and Statistical Leaders

PLAYOFF MVP


Second-year guard Bingo Bango of the Dallas Demons became the first Playoff MVP from a losing team since Didger A'doo of Chicago was named following the Season 35 Finals.

The 6-4 Bango, who came to Dallas from Los Angeles as a free agent, capped his first season as a full-time starter by tying for the playoff leadership in scoring with 20.7 per game and leading all playoff players in rebounds with 5.0 per contest.

Bango's 37-point performance against Charleston in Game 3 of the Finals was the main reason that the champion Mountaineers were handed their lone loss of the season.

A second team All-MBA selection, the sharp-shooting Bango was also named the MVP of his team for Dallas, leading the Demons in scoring with a 17.9 points per game average that was fourth-best in the league. In addition to contributing a healthy 4.8 rebounds per game, Bango also led his team in assists (2.1 per game) and steals (5).

Bango is the first Dallas player to capture the Playoff MVP award since Hall of Famer Mamadou Zongo led the Demons to their last championship in Season 28. Hall of Fame forward Shooter Flatch of the Season 20 champs and forward Tersio Tataruga of the Season 21 title team round out the four Dallas players who have won the coveted honor.

SEASON 42 PLAYOFF VOTING
1. Bingo Bango, Dallas 27
2. Naf Naf, Charleston 26.1
3. J.J. Gargantuan, Charleston 25.4


BOP-BOP MAKES HALL OF FAME




Although it took nine seasons for Beezow Doo-Doo Zopitty Bop Bop-Bop to become the 46th member of the MBA Hall of Fame, those who follow the league closely have considered him a top of the pyramid player for some time.

It has been a banner year for the versatile, 6-1 guard, who registered the highest scoring average of his career this past season and was named for the first time to first team All-MBA.

With the retirement of Hall of Famer Max Payne, Bop-Bop joins fellow guard and teammate Naf Naf as the only active Hall of Famers in the MBA.

MBA Season 42 Playoff Finals Game 4...Charleston at Dallas

Charleston 82, Dallas 55
MOUNTAINEERS RETURN TO FORM, CAPTURE TITLE
DALLAS -- Although they did not finish with a perfect record, the new MBA champions from Charleston completed the best record in league history with a stylish 82-55 victory against the Dallas Demons in Texas.

Charleston, which doubled Dallas' score in the first quarter and was never in danger of losing, finished the Season 42 campaign with a 15-1 mark...(10-0 regular season, 5-1 in playoffs) to eclipse the previous best season mark of 14-1 (9-1, 5-0) set by Houston (now Los Angeles) in Season 34. The Mountaineers also broke the "unbeaten jinx," where undefeated regular season teams (Philadelphia in Season 6 and Oklahoma City in Season 18) were unable to follow up in the playoffs with a championship.

After bowing 87-83 in Game 3 of the Finals, Charleston left little doubt about completing the championship run in Game 4, sealing what would be a 27-point victory early on.

It is the fifth championship for Charleston, which has now won titles in Season 26, Season 27, Season 36, Season 39 and now Season 42. Only Philadelphia (with a ridiculous 15) and Milwaukee (with 7) exceed the Mountaineers. With this title, Charleston passes Houston/Los Angeles and its 4 championships.

Charleston now ties Oklahoma City for the most titles in the past 10 seasons, getting its third.

The Mountaineers, like Oklahoma City, are in the ecstatic throes of their best stretch of seasons in franchise history. Since Season 36 they have finished:
S36...1st 7-3 (5-2) Champions
S37...1st 7-3 (0-2)
S38...4th 5-5
S39...2nd 6-4 (5-1) Champions
S40...1st 7-3 (0-2)
S41...1st 8-2 (3-3) lost in finals
S42...1st 10-0 (5-1) Champions
overall 50-20 in regular season
18-11 in playoffs

Additionally, Charleston goes into the free agent season prior to Season 43, with its roster totally intact...no retirements.

Dave Masterson teams have now won seven of the past 8 MBA championships. They are still far behind Tyler teams in that category.

PLAYER OF GAME
Hall of Fame point guard NAF NAF of Charleston recovered from his Game 3 slump to score 20 points and tie for his team's top rebounding honor with 7 boards while dishing out 2 assists and swiping 1 steal. Naf, who had 17 of his 20 points in the first half, was 7 for 13 from the floor and 3 for 5 from 3-Point Land, sinking 3 of 4 free throws.

Other 20-plus GVP performers
-- Charleston's wonderful pivot, J.J. Gargantuan completed an excellent campaign with a game-high 21-point performance, 3 rebounds and 1 blocked shot.
-- Charleston's third-year forward Pietro Destroyer had 12 points, 3 rebounds, 2 blocked shots and a game-high 5 assists.
-- Charleston's other forward, second-year man Wawa Wewa followed his 20-point Game 3 outing with 17 points in this one, tying Naf for team rebounding honors with 7 and nearly matching fellow forward Destroyer's assist total, getting 4.
-- With Beezow Bop-Bop returning to the Charleston lineup and guarding him, Dallas shooting guard Bingo Bango could not match his brilliant 37-point effort of the previous game. Bango did get 14 and again hit the boards hard for 6 rebounds while distributing 2 assists.
-- Steady veteran forward Matthew Vanden Boogart led Dallas with 18 points, getting 2 rebounds and 1 steal in the loss.



Finally: Following the contest, Dave Masterson rolled for the Chicago franchise to see if the Gale would be leaving the Windy City. They will not. (Whew!) They will spend at least one more season in the City of Big Shoulders, but must finish out of the cellar to avoid another such roll at the conclusion of next campaign.

NEXT UP: Official announcement of Playoff MVP and playoff stat leaders.

MBA SEASON 42 PLAYOFF FINALS GAME 3...DALLAS AT CHARLESTON

Dallas 87, Charleston 83
PERFECT STORM ENDS PERFECT SEASON FOR CHARLESTON
CHARLESTON -- Everything went almost 100 percent precisely correct for the visiting Dallas Demons and the result was the end (at 14 straight) of the record winning streak of the Charleston Mountaineers.

The game was rolled in Cape Coral, Florida, and was by all accounts one of the more exciting contests ever played.

Twenty-five time units into this high-octane contest, Charleston's All-MBA two guard Beezow Bop-Bop went down to injury and was lost for the remainder of the game. This opened the door for second-year scoring sensation, Bingo Bango of Dallas, to let loose with an offensive torrent, which is exactly what he did. Unencumbered by the defensive prowess of Bop-Bop, the 6-4 Bango put up 37 points, a number eclipsed in MBA playoff history just four other times.

Three of those times were by Charleston's own Hall of Famer, Naf Naf, who suffered through a horrendous game in which he scored just 8 points, connecting on just 2 of 9 from 3-point range, where he was constantly harassed by the defensive efforts of Dallas guard Bootlace Barnaby.

Additionally, Charleston had one of the worst free-throw shooting games of any team in recent memory, sinking just 1 of 9 charity tosses. Even a paltry 5 for 9 would have tied the game.

But with all that going against them, the Mountaineers still managed to make a close, exciting game out of it before finally succumbing.

PLAYER OF GAME
BINGO BANGO, the league's fourth-best scorer this season, had the biggest game of his young career, exploding for a game-high 37 points on 13 of 21 shooting. The long-range gunner was 5 for 8 from beyond the arc and a perfect 6 for 6 from the charity stripe. Additionally, the 6-4 Bango pulled down a game-high 7 rebounds and registered 1 assist and 1 steal. His 4-point play to end the first half was HUGE and had excited Dallas coach Tyler Masterson slapping his opponent Dave Masterson repeatedly on the back in joyous celebration.

Other 20-plus GVP performers
-- "Old Reliable" Matthew Vanden Boogart got his team out of the gate in style, leading the way in their 26-point first quarter with 10 points in the first 70 time units. The 10-year veteran forward ended up with 17 points, adding 2 rebounds and 2 assists in the major upset win.
-- Charleston center J.J. Gargantuan scored 12 points on just 7 shots, tied for top team rebounding with 4, distributed 4 assists and blocked 1 shot in the loss.
-- Second-season Charleston forward Wawa Wewa, who usually plays a subservient role on offense for Charleston, rose to the fore when needed in this game and scored 20 points while tying for team-high in rebounds with 5. Wewa also tied for most blocks in the game with 3, and had 1 steal and 1 assist.
-- One can hardly blame the injured Bop-Bop's Charleston replacement, Jesus Moron Joseph, for the loss. Although he could do little to stem the offensive shooting barrage by Bango, Joseph did swipe the ball from the Dallas guard a game-high 4 times. An 8-year veteran and longtime starter for Charleston, Joseph came up huge in the scoring ledger, leading his team in that department with 22 points while getting the most assists in the entire game with 5. He also blocked 1 shot in a rousing effort that fell just short for the home team.

MBA Season 42 Playoff Finals Game 2...Charleston at Dallas

CHARLESTON 84, DALLAS 61
MOUNTAINEERS CLIMB TO RECORD 14TH WIN
DALLAS -- The Charleston Mountaineers are breathing heady MBA air, winning a record 14 consecutive game and besting the old mark of 13 in a row set by Oklahoma City last season.

Now...can they be perfect?

No team in the previous 41 seasons has managed to run the table with a 15-0 mark, but judging by the ease in which they handled the Dallas Demons in the first two games of the finals, it appears almost a certainty.

Like the Finals opener, Charleston and Dallas were separated by one point at the half, but Charleston, which featured lock-down, smothering defense in the first two quarters, took total command in the third quarter and coasted home to an 84-61 win.

TEAM POINTS SAVED PER QUARTER
Charleston...9...8...4...2...total=23
Dallas..........0...2...2...2...total=6

TOP INDIVIDUALS, POINTS SAVED
1. Gargantuan, Charleston...10
2. Wewa, Charleston...6
3. Bop-Bop, Charleston...5

PLAYER OF GAME
Hall of Fame Charleston guard NAF NAF went on a 3-point spree to easily nail down his second POG of the post-season. The sixth-season sharp-shooter drilled the home team Demons for 31 points on 8 of 16 shooting that included 8 for 13 from beyond the arc. All of his field goals were treys. He was also 7 for 9 from the foul line, had 3 rebounds, 1 assist and swiped the ball away from his opponents 2 times.

Other 20-plus GVP Performers
-- All-MBA shooting guard Beezow Bop-Bop again filled up the stats sheet for Charleston, getting 11 points, 4 rebounds, dishing a game-high 7 assists, and following his 4-steal game with a 3-steal game (high in contest) and blocking 1 shot. He was third in the game in points saved with 5.
-- Charleston center J.J. Gargantuan turned away 10 Dallas points, scored 14 of his own, pulled down a team-high 5 boards and swatted away a game-high 3 shots in the pivot.
-- Charleston small forward Wawa Wewa frustrated Matthew Vanden Boogart all night long, holding him to just 5 points and saving 6 points in the process, second in the game. Wewa had 13 points, 4 rebounds, 2 assists, 1 steal and 1 blocked shot in the historic victory.
-- For a while there, Dallas point guard Bootlace Barnaby was matching his opposite, Naf Naf, point for point. Both players had 14 points at the half, but Barnaby would only get two more for a total of 16. Before fouling out late, the fifth-year player nabbed 5 boards and 1 assist.
-- Dallas shooting guard Bingo Bango again led his team in scoring with 17 points, grabbed 4 rebounds and had 1 assist.
-- The curtain is about to come down on the career of Dallas power forward Gulemon Mon-Mon, but the two-time All-MBA star is still getting the edge on his opponents. Although he only scored 10 points, the 6-11 Mon-Mon tied for top rebounding honors in the game, getting 7 while leading his team in assists with 4.

NEXT UP: Charleston returns to West Virginia to nail down its fifth MBA championship, and to take its place in history with the first perfect campaign in league annals.