Season 55 Rookie game

 

ROOKIES 81, CUT PILE 53 (Slaughter rule enforced)

NEWCOMERS ROMP OVER REJECTS

Season 55's incoming rookies demonstrated their ball-hawking ability on the way to a 28-point win against the over-matched refugees from the cut pile.

The final score of 81-53 included 12 steals by the MBA newbies, which would have tied a league record had this been a regular season game. Every starter on the rookie squad purloined at least one ball.

PLAYER OF THE GAME

30 GVP...Rookie forward BIG "BLUE" BOTTLE was everpresent in this victory, scoring a game-high 19 points, tying for most steals with 3, pulling down 7 rebounds and blocking 1 shot. Bottle was 7 for 14 from the floor (0 for 3 from deep) while going 5 for 7 from the foul line. Scouting reports had him primarily as a fine defender, but he showed a little more than just that in this win.

Other 20-plus GVP performers

29 GVP...6-9 rookie center Poop-Rupiah 3000...18 points...10 rebounds...1 steal.

25 GVP...6-2 rookie guard Donny "Diaper" Dupons...16 points...4 assists...3 rebounds...2 steals.

23 GVP...6-10 rookie forward Nick Kenpoop...12 points...3 rebounds...3 assists...3 steals...2 blocks.

22 GVP...6-5 cut pile forward Ed "Horsehead" Henderson...13 points...6 rebounds...2 steals...1 assist.

NEXT UP: The Season 55 Draft...followed by improvements and regressions.

Season 55 Free Agents and Rookies

 SEASON 55 FREE AGENTS

The more time goes on in the MBA the more things stay the same. 

Three-time defending champ Dallas lost just one player to free agency...their fourth rated guard who rarely played. We (the rest of the league) needed them to lose two top players...or at least one...to give us some semblance of hope.

Meanwhile, Oklahoma City, the main competition for Dallas...lost not one of their fine centers, but both of them. So much for having insurance at that position.

Gillette also lost its center...the excellent Blob Dylan.

Charleston lost its team MVP and the third-rated guard in the MBA last season, Splash Gordon.

Thirteen free agents declared this season, with only Milwaukee hanging on to all of its players. That means there will be 29 players in the upcoming draft. Thirteen free agents and 16 rookies. Everyone will get three draft picks except for Dallas, which will get two.

SEASON 55 ROOKIES

Another fine crop of rookies joining the MBA this upcoming season. Centers are especially good, and combined with the free agent centers will make for one of the most talented center drafts in history.

The rankings of the rookies (combined Dave and Tyler) are as follows:

10...6-9 center Poop-Rupiah 3000

10...6-10 forward Nick Kenpoop

9.5...6-2 guard Donny "Diaper" Dupons

8.5...5-10 guard Mini Carfartt

8.5...6-11 center Flatfoot Floogie

8.0...6-3 guard Rabbit Munchers

8.0...6-9 center Bing Bong

7.5...6-8 forward Big "Blue" Bottle

7.0...6-5 forward Professor Suggon-Deeznuts

6.5...6-8 forward Tweed Bassman

6.5...6-9 center St. Ides

5.5...5-11 guard Paul Majewski

5.5...6-0 guard Wakey Loop

4.0...6-5 center Williemays Masterson

4.0...6-7 center Louie DiMartino

3.0...6-6 guard Malcom Merriweather III

MBA Coach Firings, Hirings Annouced

COACHING CHANGES

MILWAUKEE GREYHOUNDS fire head coach Frank Pettis after five seasons, replacing him with Pap Smearz for Season 55.

Pettis compiled a regular season record of 20-30 in his five seasons, starting his tenure with the team with three consecutive playoff appearances in Seasons 50, 51 and 52. The Greyhounds had their best season under his tutelage in Season 51 when they went 6-4. Their best playoff appearance came in Season 52 when they made it all the way to the Finals before losing in five games to the Dallas Demons Whiz Kids. Their playoff record under Pettis was 4-7.

The last two seasons, Milwaukee finished in last place with identical 2-8 records. 

Smearz will be tasked with avoiding a third consecutive basement finish in the rugged East, which would bring the cube of chance into play for the team to possibly switch cities or be dissolved altogether.

The Milwaukee franchise, with seven titles, holds the longest championship drought, with their last title coming in Season 18.

SAN JOSE FIGHTING AMIGOS reluctantly let go of 18-season head coach Augustus McCrae. Manning the wheel this upcoming campaign will be Louie Subgum.

McCrae's regular season record with San Jose was 94-85, including 8 playoff appearances, 3 Finals appearances and one championship in Season 49. His teams finished first in the West four times.

The Fighting Amigos had three 8-2 campaigns under his direction, but Season 49's title came after a regular season record of 6-4. 

His playoff record with the Amigos was 11-18 and included four consecutive post-season appearances beginning with the championship season of Season 49.

San Jose finished last season with five consecutive losses to go 3-7.

Their Place in the MBA Universe...Retirees after Season 54

 

Season 54 Playoffs Wrap-Up

 

    DEMONS NOW SECOND ALL-TIME IN TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS WITH 8, PASSING MILWAUKEE (7)  AND LOS ANGELES/HOUSTON (7). PHILADELPHIA STANDS ALONE WITH 16 TITLES.

SEASON 54 PLAYOFF MVP

Hit 3 straight treys in fourth quarter to break open Game 2 of Finals.

Hit game-tying shot and game-winning buzzer-beater to win Game 3 and championship.

PREVIOUS DALLAS PLAYOFF MVPS

SEASON 53...JUZAN DJINN

SEASON 52...JUZAN DJINN

SEASON 47...CHIP BATTOE

SEASON 46...CHIP BATTOE

SEASON 42...BINGO BANGO

SEASON 28...MAMADOU ZONGO

SEASON 23...JOEY TWO-TONES

SEASON 21...TERSIO TATARUGA

SEASON 20...SHOOTER FLATCH

Season 54 Finals...Game 3...Oklahoma City at Dallas

DALLAS 74, OKLAHOMA CITY 72 (Buzzer Beater!)

HICK'S BUZZER BEATER DELIVERS TITLE

DALLAS -- Rookie point guard Vicious Hick stuck the game-winning medium jump shot as the horn sounded, giving the Whiz Kids from Dallas a come-from-behind 74-72 victory over Oklahoma City and the team's third consecutive championship.

The home team Demons, who dominated the fourth quarter in both their previous Finals wins against the Lariats, trailed by 10 points with 48 time units remaining in the game. They then proceeded to run off the next 11 points, culminated by a Hick 3-pointer, to take the lead with 22 ticks remaining.

But Oklahoma City rallied to eventually tie the contest with 3 remaining on a Buba Lipa dunk. That set the stage for Hick's heroics, who took a pass from center China P and delivered his 30th and 31st points of the game as well as the franchise's 8th overall title.

The victory marked the 16th consecutive win for Dallas, dating back to last season's championship clincher against this same Oklahoma City team. 

This time, Dallas swept the Lariats, as opposed to last season's Finals, which went the full five games.

Oklahoma City suffered two injuries in this game, with starting center Chochky Galumpkus injured for the duration just 11 ticks into the contest. Then in the fourth quarter, Lariats power forward Phillip Mianus suffered a game-ending injury. 

PLAYER OF THE GAME

36 GVP...This is the game Dallas fans have been waiting for rookie guard VICIOUS HICK to have, and he couldn't have picked a better time to deliver. In this championship clincher, Hick, who was benched temporarily in Game 2, returned to the starting lineup with a vengeance, potting 3 treys out of the gate on the way to a 13-point first quarter. The point guard would go on to rack up 31 points, the highest total of anyone in the Season 54 playoffs. He was 12 for 19 in the game, bombing home 7 treys in 12 tries, continuing his torrid shooting from Game 2 where his three consecutive 3-pointers spurred the team to a win. The 6-2 Hick showed off his rebounding skills, gathering in 4 caroms, and added 1 assist to his masterpiece. This contest was largely a battle of point guards, with Hick's scoring being the difference.

Other 20-plus GVP performers

31 GVP...Oklahoma City point guard King Czardines,,,20 points...8 assists...2 rebounds...1 steal.

26 GVP...Oklahoma City Hall of Fame forward Crentis Dentist...17 points...4 rebounds...2 steals...2 assists...1 blocked shot.

24 GVP...Oklahoma City reserve center Chat Bot...13 points...9 rebounds...2 blocked shots.

NEXT UP: Final playoff stats and the announcement of Playoff MVP. 

Congratulations to Dallas...for my money the best team ever assembled in the long history of the MBA.

Season 54 Playoffs...Finals Game 3...Dallas at Oklahoma City

DALLAS 99, OKLAHOMA CITY 83

RELENTLESS DEMONS WIN AGAIN

OKLAHOMA CITY -- The pattern remained the same in Game 2 of these Finals, with the Dallas Demons leaving the Oklahoma City Lariats in the dust in the fourth quarter following three periods of hard-fought, close basketball.

The two-time defending champions, spurred by three consecutive 3-point bombs to start the fourth by rookie guard Vicious Hick, triumphed for the 14th consecutive time this season, besting the Lariats 99-83.

For the second game in a row, the same five players for Dallas checked in with 20-plus GVP performances, while the Whiz Kids again controlled the boards 25-11. 

With a series sweep in their sights, Dallas stands to tie the all-time winning-streak record of 16 in a row (including last season's championship game) held by their own franchise in Seasons 46 and 47.

It was all too much for coach Grady Booch of Oklahoma City, who was thrown out of the game with his second technical foul in the fourth quarter.

PLAYER OF THE GAME

38 GVP...Seventh-year guard HANDSY JOE POTATOE of Oklahoma City was brilliant in defeat, leading both teams in scoring for the second straight game, this time with 29 points. The one-time Rookie of the Year, despite being guarded by the great Juzan Djinn for much of the game, managed to go 11 for 18 from the floor, bombing home 4 of 8 3-point shots and going 3 for 3 from the foul line. The 6-5 Lariats' stalwart also tied for team-high in rebounds with 3, dished out 4 assists and blocked 2 shots. He has had an excellent post-season.

Other 20-plus GVP performers

35 GVP...Dallas Hall of Fame shooting guard Juzan Djinn...22 points...5 rebounds...4 assists...4 blocked shots.

28 GVP...Dallas power forward Satan Israel...24 points (3 slams)...4 rebounds.

25 GVP...Dallas small forward Pete "the Steakman" Marzano...18 points...5 rebounds...2 steals.

23 GVP...Dallas rookie guard Vicious Hick...16 points (4 treys)...4 rebounds...3 assists. 

22 GVP...Dallas center Biggus Dickus...4th triple-double of career with 12 points...5 rebounds...5 assists.

22 GVP...Oklahoma City power forward Phillip Mianus...15 points...3 rebounds...3 blocks...1 assist.

NEXT UP: The Finals return to Dallas, where the Whiz Kids are overwhelming favorites to wrap up a third straight championship in front of the hometown fans.