MBA FINALS SEASON 32

PHILADELPHIA 83, MILWAUKEE 73 (GAME 3)

MILWAUKEE--Thanks largely to second-string guard Pismo Beach, the Philadelphia Phobia are now just one win away from capturing an unprecedented fourth consecutive MBA championship.
Beach, subbing for the fouled out Jerry Curl, scored 11 fourth-quarter points as Philadelphia broke open a tight contest to go ahead in the Finals 2 games to 1.
The game was typical of each of these championship contests, which have all been up and down affairs in which neither team cowed to the defensive prowess of the other. In this one, both teams cranked up 60 shots, about 10 shots more each than a team puts up in a typical contest.
Cheetos Jones, who stands to gain Hall of Fame status with another Phobia title, was the Game MVP with a game-high 22 points, 5 rebounds an assist and a steal. The 5-11 point guard also did his usual defensive number on the opposing guard, holding Benny Lava to 10 points below his playoff average.
Jones was not particularly successful from 3-point range, but yakked up 9 treys in a determined attempt to take over the game.
Meanwhile, Milwaukee's Hall of Fame guard Hrundi V. Bakshi, although leading his team with 18 points, did not attempt a single trey.
The Phobia now have a chance to clinch the title on their home court, with two chances to get the one win needed to make every index card on the team immortal.

SPECIAL OBSERVATION: Just to indicate how remarkable Philadelphia has been in this four-season stretch, whether they win it all or not, consider this:
Only two members of the current Philadelphia roster, forward Tug Hershorts and center Ama Spikie were on the roster when the Phobia won the first of its current string of titles in Season 29. So even as they were practically turning the roster over, Philadelphia has retained remarkably consistent excellence.





PHILADELPHIA 82, MILWAUKEE 78 (Game 2)

PHILADELPHIA--After the stellar performance of Philadelphia center Ama Spikie in this one, coach Curly Hogbottom might be ordering all of his players to stare blankly at the wall in front of them for some five minutes at a time.
Spikie, whose unusual Zen method was noted in the previous post, went off in a "must win" Game 2 for a leading 25 points to spur the three-time defending champions to an 82-78 win that evened this championship series at one game each. Spikie was 11 for 13 from the floor, including a pair of 3-pointers, nabbed 4 rebounds, dished out 3 assists and blocked 2 shots while holding his counterpoint Heater VanMeter to 6 points.
The MVP of the Game's efficiency was indicative of the offensive excellence on display by both teams, with Milwaukee shooting 64.2 percent and Philadelphia 60.7 percent, despite their opponents' strong defensive abilities.
Hrundi V. Bakshi followed his 34-point Game 1 explosion with a 20-point outing in this contest, but Milwaukee could never close the gap entirely, although they stayed within reach of Philly throughout the game.
The Greyhounds trailed by 12 with a time unit to go in the third quarter, when Bakshi drained an acrobatic trey, was fouled and converted his free throw to keep his team within 8 points going into the final frame.
The visitors got within three, but after Sunny Osiris muscled his way to the hoop for a bucket that increased Philly's lead to 68-63, Milwaukee coach Raisin Sport went ape-shit on the sidelines, throwing his coat on the court and drawing a technical foul.
Spikie made the subsequent free throw for the Phobia, then passed to Osiris for another Philadelphia basket to give his team a comfortable 71-63 lead that they held to the end, despite another late Milwaukee charge.
Did Sport's histrionics cause his team the game?
"Well," noted Milwaukee guard Benny Lava, "if we would have made our fucking free throws this could have been our game."







MILWAUKEE 101, PHILADELPHIA 73 (GAME 1)

MILWAUKEE--The Milwaukee Greyhounds, led by the 34-point effort of Hall of Fame guard Hrundi V. Bakshi, registered the MBA's first 100-point game of Season 32 to win the opener of the best of five finals series against the three-time defending champion Philadelphia Phobia.
The 101-73 victory was the third in three meetings this season against the Phobia, as the home team played a practically perfect offensive game, coming within five points of the playoff scoring record set by the same Milwaukee franchise in Season 6 against Dallas.
All five Greyhound starters were in double figures and had excellent games, but none more so than the MVP of the Game, Bakshi. The 6-7 guard was red-hot from the start, hitting his first 11 shots in a game in which he was 15 for 17 from the floor. His 34 points was four short of the MBA playoff scoring record set by Dan Mann of Milwaukee on two occasions (Season 9 and Season 12).
Milwaukee, which has now bested Philadelphia in all three of their meetings this season, out-rebounded the Phobia 26-12, shot 66.2 percent from the field and put up an astonishing 71 shots in the game.
"We may have to put Cheetos Jones on Bakshi," said Philadelphia's head coach, Curly Hogbottom. "That's hard for us to do because it takes Jones away from the point, where he is so effective offensively. Plus, Lava has been playing very well for them and could really go off if we move Jones off of him."
An exhausted Ama Spikie would not answer any questions after the game, staring at the wall, just inches away, as if in a motionless trance for a prolonged period of time in the locker room.
"He does that sometimes after a loss," said Hogbottom. "He'll be ready for Game 2."

Season 32 Playoffs...Semifinals

Milwaukee 69, Sacramento 51 (Game 1)

MILWAUKEE--Veteran point guard Benny Lava (game-high 22 points, game-high 6 rebounds)led the way for the home team Greyhounds who took over after a close first half and coasted to a 69-51 decision in the first of the best of three playoff games.
Lava and All-MBA Hall of Famer Hrundi V. Bakshi (18 points)proved to be a potent one-two punch for Milwaukee. The league's top scoring team shot 51.9 percent compared to the league's worst point-producing bunch, which was held to just 46.2 percent accuracy. The stats held true in the rebounding department as well, as the best team in basketball mauled the worst in that department 23-12.
Zingo Mamaluke played well for the losing River Dogs, scoring 18 points and recording three steals.
The game saw a plethora of thefts, with the River Dogs recording six while the Greyhounds accounted for eight. Blocked shots were flying all over as well. Sacramento recorded 11 blocks, and Milwaukee nearly matched that number with 10.


Milwaukee 83, Sacramento 56 (Game 2)

SACRAMENTO--The beating was more thorough this time, with the Greyhounds of Milwaukee shamelessly picking on the underdog River Dogs 83-56 in front of the losers' home crowd.
It was the Milwaukee guards again leading the way and this time Benny Lava was joined by running mate Hrundi V. Bakshi as co-MVP of the Game. Lava led both teams in scoring again with 21 points, despite fouling out, and Bakshi rang up 19, while leading his team with 5 rebounds.
Stretch Cunningham led Sacramento with 14 points and both teams with 6 boards.
The Greyhounds now await the winner of the Philadelphia-San Jose series to play for the MBA title for the first time in 12 seasons.
Milwaukee's franchise has not advanced this far since Hall of Famer Tommy Zoop left the franchise after the team fell one game short of a championship in Season 20. Zoop was a fresh-faced rookie the last time the Greyhounds tasted champagne from the MBA loving cup, way back in Season 18. Milwaukee has been eliminated in the first round five times since the Zoop era ended.
Still, they trail only Philadelphia in overall titles, winning seven times in the first 18 seasons.

San Jose 80, Philadelphia 60 (Game 1)

SAN JOSE -- The Fighting Amigos shocked the basketball world in this semifinal opener, clobbering the three-time defending champion Phobia 80-60 in a game they dominated from start to finish.
Fat Bob Herzfeld (18 points, 4 steals) delivered a 4-point play on the first time unit of the ball game, hitting a trey, getting fouled and making his free throw. And the Amigos were off to the races, despite the fact that Tyler Masterson was tossing the dice for the Philadelphia team.
L.B. Damned (21 points, 4 rebounds, 2 blocks) was the Game MVP for San Jose. Herzfeld's back court mate Funsy Van Slochum added 15 more for the winners.
Meanwhile, the toughest defense in the league was holding Philly to 43.6 percent shooting, making the next contest between these two a do-or-die for the Phobia.

Philadelphia 91, San Jose 66 (Game 2)

PHILADELPHIA--Apparently the Philadelphia Phobia is comfortable on its home floor. With every starter in double figures and none scoring fewer than 14 points, the three-time defending champs not only stayed alive in their hunt for a fourth title, they made a bold statement with this game, exceeding the 20-point margin of victory of San Jose in Game 1 and scoring 91 points against the best defense in the MBA.
After a close first half in which they led 42-39, Philadelphia totally dominated the third and fourth quarters. Center Ama Spikie was the game's high scorer with 24 and the MVP of the Game. Tug Hershorts, the Phobia's 6-11 power forward, registered the second triple-double of his career, scoring 15 points, grabbing a game-high 6 boards and dishing out 5 assists.
The Fighting Amigos blocked nine Philadelphia shots, but it mattered little, as the home team shot a smoking 61.3 percent while getting off 62 shots in the process. Jerry Curl chipped in with 17, Cheetos Jones had 15 and Sunny Osiris added 14 in the romp.
The only notable scorer for San Jose was Game 1 MVP L.B. Damned, who had 18.
The win sets up a winner-takes-the-series showdown in Game 3 at San Jose.
Batten the hatches.


Philadelphia 81, San Jose 76 (Game 3)

SAN JOSE--A 31-point fourth quarter by the home team Fighting Amigos was not enough to make up a 16-point deficit, so the Philadelphia Phobia will have a chance to go after their fourth consecutive title.
San Jose cooked its own goose with 10 fouls in the opening quarter that gave Philly 9 points at the charity stripe and a more-than-solid 26-14 lead. The advantage increased at the end of the next two quarters, thanks to some smoking 3-point shooting by the visitors (10 for 14 from long range).
But with no hope in sight and Cheetos Jones fouled out for Philly, the Amigos began a comeback that saw them cut the 16-point deficit to 8, then 6, then 4 points at 76-72 before Philadelphia's power forward Tug Hershorts (12 points) delivered the dagger in the form of a 3-point basket, putting an end to the late charge.
Hall of Famer Sagittal Occlusal, playing in his final contest for the San Jose franchise, was at the forefront of the comeback attempt and named the Game MVP for his game-high 21 point performance, which included 5 rebounds and 2 blocked shots.
They will never see his like again.
Cheetos Jones led Philadelphia in scoring with 20 (including 5 for 8 from 3-point range), and again, all five starters were in double figures for Philly.
When it came down to it, the calling card of San Jose, the league's best defense, was trumped by the offense of Philadelphia.
The Phobia, the franchise with the most titles in MBA history (13), will now face the franchise with the next-most titles, Milwaukee (7).
The two Eastern Division powers met twice in the regular season, with Milwaukee winning both encounters; the first a home win (69-54) and the second an 84-76 overtime win on Philadelphia's home court.
The two franchises have met in the MBA finals five times prior to this, in Seasons 4,6,11,18 and 19. The first four times they met in the finals, Milwaukee was victorious. But Philadelphia prevailed in Season 19, which happens to be the last time the Greyhounds made it to the final series.
Until now.

MBA REGULAR SEASON 32 FINALE

One more upset as we head for home in Season 32

Sacramento 72, Charleston 65

Any smidgen of playoff hopes for the Charleston Mountaineers was mathematically wiped out tonight as the lowly Sacramento River Dogs came into town and pulled an unlikely 72-65 upset. The surprising triumph by the River Dogs did, however, keep their playoff hopes alive, making them 3-5 on the season, one game behind Seattle, who they play in a home and home series to wind up the regular campaign. They would need a sweep to return to the playoffs for the second year in a row.
Two guard Zingo Mamaluke was the unlikely hero in this one for Sacramento. He entered the game averaging 7.7 points per contest, then proceeded to light up the Mountaineers for a game-high 22 to earn Game MVP honors.
It was just one of those games for Charleston. Sacramento hit a desperation three-quarters court trey by Bisqueiro Cutoff to end the first quarter with a 22-18 lead. Then the River Dogs went into halftime with a 40-33 lead on the strength of a final time unit trey by Moxie Mamalucco. .
Trailing 55-48 after three quarters, the home team finally seemed to gain control of the game scoring the first eight points of the fourth quarter to grab their first lead 56-55. But Sacramento would not be denied this game, overwhelming Charleston once more until the lead swelled to 12 again.
Sacramento played their asses off on defense, registering 7 steals and 9 blocked shots and holding Charleston to just 45 percent shooting. Three of those steals came from lightning-fast Moxie Mamalucco, who is now tied for the league lead with 11 thefts while playing part-time off the bench. He was pressed into major minutes (or time units) tonight when starting point guard Larry Rosegardener fouled out of the game without registering a single statistic. Rosegardener started every quarter for Sacramento but found himself on the bench almost instantaneously each time after fouling. He entered the fourth quarter with four fouls and fouled out on the very first time unit. Sacramento head coach Z.Z. Magoo slapped him upside the head when he hang-dogged it to the bench. It was the fifth time he has fouled out this season in 8 games. Eleven time units later, his replacement Mamalucco also fouled out. This forced defensive specialist Boo Radley into the game. The home crowd knew Charleston was doomed when Radley, who was 2 for 21 shooting entering the game, promptly sank a medium jump shot.
The Sacramento win ends the crossover contests for the season, with the East winning 8 and the West 2.

The Season 32 Standings entering the home stretch are as follows, with 6 of the 10 teams still mathematically in the playoff hunt. The last two teams in each division are already out.

EAST
1. Milwaukee 6-2
2. Philadelphia 6-2
3. Houston 5-3
4. Charleston 3-5
5. Chicago 3-5

WEST
1. San Jose 6-2
2. Seattle 4-4
3. Sacramento 3-5
4. Dallas 2-6
5. Oklahoma City 2-6

The remaining schedule is as follows:

Milwaukee at Philadelphia . . . HUGE game between top two teams in East
Charleston at Chicago
Houston at Philadelphia ... Philadelphia finishes season first and could have playoff spot clinched
Seattle at Sacramento ... Seattle could clinch playoff spot with win
San Jose at Dallas

Oklahoma City at Dallas
Sacramento at Seattle ... If Sacramento won first meeting, this game determines the sacrificial playoff lamb for the first place team in the East.
Houston at Charleston...could be huge game
San Jose at Oklahoma City
Milwaukee at Chicago ... Might determine final playoff spot.

West wins low-scoring All Star contest

MILWAUKEE--The underdog Western Division upset the mighty East 58-54 in the lowest-scoring All Star contest in MBA history.
The previous low score posted by a winner came in Season 4, where the East won, scoring only 67 points.
The MVP of this 32nd All Star game was L.B. Damned of San Jose, who racked up a game-high 17 points (tied with teammate Cock A. Doodledoo of Seattle) and a game-high 6 rebounds (tied with teammate Harold Arlen of Seattle).
Charleston small forward Jimsy Redfern, playing for the East, set an All Star game record with nine blocked shots, besting the previous mark of 8 held by Kuch-Kuch Hotahey of Seattle, set in Season 29. Redfern is now fourth all time in career blocked shots (11)in All Star games. Tom "the Bomb" Kondla had four blocked shots in this year's contest, giving him 12 for a career and putting him in third for All Star blocks. Curly Hogbottom is the all-time All Star block leader with 16.
Doodledoo also set a defensive record, getting three steals and breaking an 11-player deadlock of previous performers who had swiped two each. A steal by Sagittal Occlusal of San Jose in his final star contest moved him into third place all time with a total of 5. The all-time steals leader for All Star games is Momadou Zongo, who swiped 8.
Hrundi V. Bakshi of Milwaukee and Looky Whos of Houston each had 13 points to lead the East.
The East still leads the overall series 21 to 11, but the West has now captured five of the last six contests.

Next: Chicago (1-4) at Milwaukee (4-1).

Season 32 at the All Star Break

I don't know if you can read these stats written in pencil...if not, let me know. But here are the leaders thus far.








Above are the Season 32 All Star Game (in Milwaukee) teams.
With his selection to the East squad, Hrundi V. Bakshi of Milwaukee becomes the 32nd Member of the MBA Hall of Fame and the first full-fledged member since Sagittal Occlusal earned the honor in Season 27.
Of special note, the lack of even one Chicago all star marks the second time this has happened . . . the first and only other time was way way way back in Season 5.

Conspicuous by his absence from the team is last season's MVP Cheetos Jones, who is having an off year offensively, averaging just 14 points per game on 32.1 percent shooting.

More deserving players who are having excellent seasons but were edged in All Star selections include"
* Guards Benny Lava of Milwaukee, Chuckie "Swishcat" Sellegren of Charleston and rookie Didger A'Doo of Chicago
* Forward Bruno Pantanal of Milwaukee
* On the opposite end of that spectrum, Heer Kitty-Kitty of Seattle sneaks onto the team with 15.0 points thanks to an injury to Crash D. Bordz of Oklahoma City

FYI, the East has won 21 and the West 10 in All Star Game competition

Sagittal Occlusal (who will be playing in his final All Star Game) becomes the 13th player in MBA history to be selected to seven or more games. He will also be starting for the sixth time, which has only been achieved by eight players in history. The lists are as follows:

Most Appearances
10-Uncle Bob Masterson
10-Momadou Zongo
9-Curly Hogbottom
8-Doug Fresh
8-Jonny Cockaroo
7-Boone Doggle
7-Rip Slamjam
7-Tommy Zoop
7-Cam Bodia
7-Marcus Pettis *
7-Diamond Dallas Paige
7-Bill Rustler
7-Sagittal Occlusal
* only player on list not in Hall of Fame

Most All Star Starts
9-Curly Hogbottom
8-Momadou Zongo
7-Boone Doggle
7-Uncle Bob Masterson
6-Diamond Dallas Paige
6-Soul Duran
6-Tommy Zoop
6-Sagittal Occlusal



As you can plainly see by the retirement list, DMs MBA teams took it big on the chin. While Tyler Masterson's teams will lose just one player to retirement following this season (albeit a good one in center Bascomb Ducksnort of Houston, who is having his best year), DMs teams will lose 10 players, including Hall of Famer Sagittal Occlusal of San Jose, who is currently the third-most decorated player in MBA history behind Curly Hogbottom and Uncle Bob Masterson.
Oklahoma City is losing three starters, including the injured Crash D. Bordz who is having his best year ever and Jimmy Wharfdale. a big-time Lariat scorer through the years.

MBA Season 31 Playoffs

SAN JOSE EVENS SERIES
CHARLESTON - As expected, this semi-final series will go the full three-game distance; with the only surprise being that the wins by the San Jose Fighting Amigos and the Charleston Mountaineers both came on the road.
In this one, San Jose, led by first-team All-MBA small forward L.B. Damned's game-high 24 points, held off a fourth-quarter charge to secure a 78-73 triumph.

Damned's effort came against perhaps the top defensive forward in the league, Jimsy Redfern, and included scoring from all over the court, including a 2-for-2 day behind the 3-point arc. Meanwhile, Redfern had another stellar game, getting the seventh triple-double of his career with a line score of 10 points, 5 rebounds and 5 blocks. He was one assist away from becoming the first MBA player to record more than one quadruple-double. Only Redfern and J.D. Jedreat have ever recorded a quad.

Walt "Heisenburg" White ignited a near-comeback off the bench for Charleston, bringing the home team within four points halfway through the final quarter, draining 3s to score 12 of his team-high 19 points.

The series, even at one game each, returns to San Jose for the third and deciding game to determine which club goes to the finals.