Season 46 Preseason Predictions

WEST DIVISION

Sacramento is a solid favorite to finish first, and San Jose looks to be last. The other three teams are a real toss-up.

1. SACRAMENTO RIVER DOGS

The R-Dogs return their championship starting lineup of Season 44 for the third consecutive season, an unheard of streak of stability in the MBA. On top of that, four of the five starters improved impressively. The biggest improvement was the league assists leader, Grunkle Terry, getting even better on the pass. They dug an early 1-4 hole to start last season but recovered to finish 5-5, barely missing the playoffs. It's unlikely that they will stumble that badly at any point in Season 46.
Tyler's pick: Sacramento

2. SEATTLE STAMPEDE

This is an upset pick, admittedly. But the Stampede's two young guards, Don Barzini and AnDamian Wayne both improved to a good degree going into their second season. Seattle adds the top rated, tough-rebounding rookie forward, 6-9 Wardy Joubert III to go with team MVP Pietro Destroyer, who is coming off his best scoring season (16.6 ppg). Adding one more win to last season's 5-5 seems do-able, which should mean a playoff spot.
Tyler's pick: Los Angeles

3. LOS ANGELES BIG ONE

We're not counting the defending champs out of the playoffs by a longshot. But having to replace their entire front line takes them out of the title picture. Getting back to 7-3 is out of the question. Having point guard Dr. Marcus Brody for the entire season is the only plus. Norman Conquest, the other guard, also got worse offensively.
Tyler's pick: Oklahoma City

4. OKLAHOMA CITY LARIATS

The Lariats shocked the MBA with a 7-3 second-place campaign that's not likely to be repeated. The big question revolves around the starting center position, where 7-1 rookie Chochky Galumpkus, the top player in the draft, will replace the fourth-year excellence of  7-footer Willie Carry McCoffee, the guy who Oklahoma City has rallied around the past three seasons.
Tyler's pick: Seattle

5. SAN JOSE FIGHTING AMIGOS

After staying out of the cellar for 25 seasons prior to last season's 3-7 campaign, the Amigos are a good bet to be at the bottom again. With two rookies and two second-year players in the starting lineup, they are, at least, the league's youngest team with three promising players. Not rising yet.
Tyler's pick: San Jose

EAST DIVISION

The East, which was tightly bunched between four teams, will likely mirror that same scenario in Season 46, with only second-year Kansas City out of the playoff conversation.

1. DALLAS DEMONS

We keep picking Dallas to finish first in the East. But, despite having the league's best player in Hall of Famer Chip Battoe, they keep finishing second and getting ousted in the playoff semifinals. They return three of the league's top scorers in Battoe (1st-21.0 ppg), center Gotoo Grot (4th-17.8 ppg) and guard Bingo Bango (5th-17.0 ppg). With Battoe and Grot, they are the only team to have more than one All-MBA player. This should be enough to win the East. But will that hole at power forward keep them from advancing again?
Tyler's pick: Dallas

2. CHARLESTON MOUNTAINEERS

Cat Timol replaces the defense- and rebound-minded Akbar Zagobia (retired) for last season's division champs (6-4). Otherwise, not much has changed for this veteran group, which is getting older and struggled desperately to score and rebound at times last season. Ten-year point guard Lapiz Lapiz Boligrafo, who led the league in 3-point shooting, is back and must remain healthy. Defense is their identity.

Tyler's pick: Philadelphia

3. MILWAUKEE GREYHOUNDS

The Greyhounds have the longest playoff drought in the MBA, and due to weakness at forwards, that should continue. Two tough losses at the end of last season kept them out of the post-season by one game with a 5-5 mark. Third-year guards Fatty McButterpants and All-MBA player Lannigan Hobo are outstanding offensively, and second-year center Papa Popcorn, at 7-2, is much improved on defense. They could sneak in, but probably not.

Tyler's pick: Charleston

4. PHILADELPHIA PHOBIA

Philly finished 5-5 despite losing Hall of Fame guard Colquitt Croix for most of the season. They get him back, and obtained star center Chutcher Mouthchair from champion Los Angeles. But the second guard spot is a black hole and the Phobia has the MBA's oldest roster. It seems now or never for them.

Tyler's pick: Milwaukee

5. KANSAS CITY BASTARD ANGELS

After going 1-9 in their maiden MBA voyage, the Bastards feature a totally younger and revamped starting lineup. They added top-ranked rookie guard Freddy Chepuzzo, steady Philadelphia center Carga Larga and San Jose's team MVP, forward Cam Caldwell. They'll be better, but will still suck hind-tit in the East.
Tyler's pick: Kansas City

All-MBA predictions  (only Battoe was picked correctly last season)

Guard -- Colquitt Croix, Philadelphia (Tyler picks Lannigan Lord Hobo, Milwaukee)

Guard -- Dr. Marcus Brody, Los Angeles (unanimous)

Center -- Chochky Galumpkus, Oklahoma City (Tyler picks Chutcher Mouthchair, Philadelphia)

Forward -- Pietro Destroyer, Seattle (unanimous)

Forward -- Chip Battoe, Dallas (unanimous)

MVP Selection 

Chip Battoe, Dallas...for the fourth consecutive time (unanimous)

Rookie of the Year Selection

Chochky Galumpkus, Oklahoma City (Tyler picks Wardy Joubert III, Seattle)

NEXT UP: The start of Season 46...Bracket No. 1

San Jose at Sacramento: The West favorite against the pick to finish last in the division.

Seattle at Kansas City: Cross-over action as revamped BAs look to ambush hopeful Stampede.

Los Angeles at Oklahoma City: Defending champs vs. debut of OKC rookie Chochky Galumpkus.

Philadelphia at Milwaukee: Who gets the early advantage in playoff hunt between these old rivals?

Featured Game: Charleston at Dallas: East heavyweights go toe-to-toe right out of the gate