MBA SEASON 37 PREVIEW

Standings Predictions

The four playoff teams from last season, plus Chicago, will vie for post-season spots. Houston may have slightly more talent than Chicago, but the Iguanas draw the league's toughest schedule, with crossover games against Oklahoma City and Seattle, the two toughest teams in the West.

Tyler believes that expected rookie sensation Naf Naf, who he has dubbed "unstoppable," tips the scales in favor of Oklahoma City in a big way, going so far as predicting no losses for the Lariats. That remains to be seen.

East Division
1ST—Charleston Mountaineers
2nd – Chicago Gale
3rd – Houston Iguanas
4th – Milwaukee Greyhounds
5th—Philadelphia Phobia

West Division
1ST – Oklahoma City Lariats
2nd – Seattle Stampede
3rd – Dallas Demons
4th – Sacramento River Dogs
5th – San Jose Fighting Amigos

Major Moves
Chicago adds Hall of Fame guard Ching-Chong Chung to starting lineup from San Jose and longtime Seattle starting guard Ginger Vampire, who will come off the bench. Didger A’doo and Chung will be potent scoring punch for Gale. Glut of forwards by Houston allows Gale to pick up rookies Stu Gatz and Pap Smears, both candidates to start for Chicago. The bad news is they lost Harold Arlen.

Houston gets rebounding great Harold Arlen, who immediately bolsters starting lineup and teams with regular season MVP and Rookie of Year Vic Hitler at forward, pushing Blue “Rondo” Alaturk to bench. Iguanas lose league’s top scorer and All-MBA guard T. Kanes Masterson. But they have Hall of Famer Hrundi V. Bakshi ready to move back into starting lineup in his place. We’ll see what he has left.

Philadelphia snatches league’s leading scorer from Houston as T. Kanes Masterson adds much needed scoring punch to once-proud franchise.

The Rookies
6-0 Guard, Naf Naf, Oklahoma City Lariats…Comes into league with rep as maybe best scorer ever
6-7 Forward, Walter Sobchack, Oklahoma City Lariats…Best rookie forward, another starting scorer
7-1 Center, Ugatta Noluvfer Spikie, Milwaukee Greyhounds…Ama’s younger, taller brother a good one
6-8 Forward, Tea Time Typhoo, Charleston Mountaineers…pressing for starting spot for champs
6-9 Forward, Stu Gatz, Chicago Gale…will step into starting role, good player
6-11 Center, King Schmeckpepr. Sacramento River Dogs…shot-blocking newcomer will take over pivot
6-8 Forward, Pap Smearz, Chicago Gale…battling fellow rookie Gatz for starting position
6-7 Forward, Jairo Capoeira, Seattle Stampede…adds even more youth to starting lineup
6-0 Guard, Lapiz Lapiz Bligrafo, Dallas Demons…will start at point guard
5-11 Guard, Bob “Fats” Kittle, Seattle Stampede…good passer will see lots of action
6-1 Guard, Mel A. Noma, Philadelphia Phobia…gets starting nod at point for Philly
6-8 Center, Diz McMasters, Dallas Demons…backup center
6-0 Guard, Rosebud Petrie…joins brother Rob “Pitter Patter” Petrie in cut pile
6-8 Center, Steve “Drunk Uncle” Bromberger…the best among the league’s worst cut pile centers
6-8 Forward. Philo Catmando … cut pile, maybe for life
5-11 Guard, Cremeofsum Yun Guy…not horrible on offense…horrible on defense…cut pile

Best Improvements
6-6 Forward Joe “Blue” Pulaski, lost a number on free throw misses, got a Deny on 7 against shot, up to a +2 against the pass…still not out of cut pile
6-2 Guard, Simon Barsinister of Philadelphia improved four times, hits on 8 medium shot, Denies Shot on 10, slam dunks on 6 low and goes to a 4 on defensive rebounding…the team’s high scorer last year will still not start in front of newly acquired All-MBA guard T. Kanes Masterson, who led the league in scoring last season.
6-11 Forward, Gulemon Mon-Mon of Dallas improves big time going into 12th season with a Deny Shot on 8
6-0 Guard, Totes McGoats of San Jose loses a foul and gets a Deny on 8
5-11 Guard, Funsy VanSlochum of San Jose…the ageless one, going into his 14th season, is still starting and returns to his old team after a five-season absence, improving to a 6 dribbler and +3 defender against the dribble
6-4 Guard, Ginger Vampire of Chicago, longtime starter for Seattle will come off the bench for the Gale an even stronger player who now hits on 8 from medium, advances to a 6 passer and a +3 against the dribble
6-7 Forward, Art Vandelay of Chicago adds two “goods” down low and becomes the league’s best passer, now an 8
6-9 Forward, Sven Marquardt of Seattle improves to a 5 passer and fills in the 7 spot on his down low shot where he now only misses on a 12
6-7 Center, Dis Reflexia of Seattle…last season’s All-MBA center as a rookie, improves 3 times significantly…now a +2 against the dribble, improves to a 7 passer and gets a Deny Shot on 10, giving him 7-8-9-10 defenses against the shot.
6-1 Guard, Lemon Jell-0, Oklahoma City Lariats…All-MBA guard who has led the league in steals the past four seasons in a row, got better at stealing the ball…he is now a +6 against the pass.
6-3 Guard, Snarkey Comment of Houston will be better on defense with a Deny on 6 to go with his FM on 8
6-8 Center, Hodor of Houston pushes past Sanjay Patel into the starting lineup, going to an 11 offensive rebounder and adding a deny shot on 4.
6-1 Guard,Beezow Bop-Bop of Charleston came into his own as the Playoff MVP for the champion Mountaineers last year and will be even more assertive this season, increasing his tendency to shoot the ball in the short zone, where he is deadly.
6-1 Guard, Jesus Moron Joseph of Charleston was promoted to a starting spot and immediately improved, adding a good down low on 9 and increasing his passing ability to a 6 to match his dribbling capability.
6-6 Forward, Cy A. Nara of Charleston improved on both his ability against the pass and against the dribble where he is now a +4 both ways. Not bad for a fourth forward on the team.

FIRST GAMES

Dallas at Philadelphia
Seattle at Chicago
Charleston at Oklahoma City
Houston at Milwaukee
San Jose at Sacramento

As you can see, Seattle at Chicago will be a good test for both teams and last season's champs from Charleston travel to take on this season's predicted champs at Oklahoma City. San Jose at Sacramento pits the two worst teams in the league.

RETIRED PLAYERS FILED AWAY IN PROPER PERSPECTIVE